Be sure to catch up on your reading and check out the first several chapters of Shameless Audacity, as well as more good stuff from Cory at MinistryMall.org!
This book began when two little words rang in my heart. I am a
firm believer in the power of words. I am also a firm believer in, at the very
moment a word strikes, finding the nearest dictionary and truly grasping all
that is being said. This may be my inner-nerd, but I love searching dictionaries,
lexicons, and any online sources. I searched the word “shameless” and found the
chapters Owning Disgrace and Our Father on my computer screen. It
took a few days for the spiritual exhaustion to subside from that short soiree
in humility and worship. Now it is time to grasp all the Holy Spirit wanted to
teach in the word “audacity.”
Audacity is a word that I have heard, albeit not very often. It
takes little effort to glean from context that audacity speaks of the extreme,
but what does it really mean? Merriam-Webster defines audacity as “bold or
arrogant disregard for normal restraints.” It is taken from the Latin word audax and can mean daring, bold,
courageous, spirited, foolhardy, presumptuous, or rash. This word could be used
in a very positive way, but was generally reserved for insolent boldness,
especially when imprudent or unconventional.
If we want a clear vision of audacity at its worst, a great
illustration is found in the parable of the unforgiving servant of Matthew
18:21-35. Jesus tells the story of a servant that owed a King a very large
amount, about 20 years of pay for the average worker. Upon discovery that the
servant could not pay, the king ordered the man’s wife and children sold in
order to pay the debt. The servant pleaded with the king and was shown mercy. That
same servant loaned another servant a few dollars, about a day’s wages for the
average worker. When his debtor could not pay, he began berating and choking
the man. This report of idiocy found its way back to the king. For not
extending the same courtesy that was shown him, the servant was punished. The
servant had real audacity.
To be audacious is to have a boldness based on something either
strange, foolhardy, or out of bounds. As I traveled down this road of self
discovery, I convinced myself that I was doing pretty well. I have been
actively practicing ownership of disgrace and acceptance of my Father. I asked
for a need and received an eye opening look into the needs of the world around
me. I asked for my own needs and God confirmed my place in this out of the box
ministry. That sounds like a great place to stop. Would you believe that, once again,
God disagrees with me? In my world of thousands of written words a day, God
went to great lengths to touch my heart with two very specific words. The first
word led me to valleys of humility and mountain tops of victory. The spiritual
rollercoaster seemed to have run its course. Fortunately (or unfortunately, you
decide), this particular rollercoaster is one of those that takes its helpless
passengers to the end of the course, stops for a brief second, and then does it
all in reverse!
I hesitate to type the words. I know that, as soon as they move
from my mind to the outside world, I will be held specifically responsible and
accountable for my subsequent behavior. I feel that same feeling in the pit of
my stomach that happens on the first swim of the year. Remember that feeling?
It has
been a long, cold winter. More than anything, you want to jump into the pool in
front of you. But, you know the sun has not been high in the sky for long and
that the rain in May still falls cold. Do you jump? Do you find some
unsuspecting sibling or cousin to push in first? Come on. Jump. You can do
this, but it will be so cold!
Ok. Here it goes. I’m not sure that I have ever sought God for
something audacious. I have complete confidence that God can move in and alter
different aspects of normal life, but
audacity is complete “disregard for normal restraints.” As a pastor and
teacher, the receptacle may be larger than others’, but my God is still in a
box. Seeking God with boldness based on human understanding and logic can be
very rewarding. I wonder what happens to the one seeking God with boldness
based on God’s understanding and logic. 1 Corinthians tells us that the
foolishness of God is wiser than the wisdom of men. Why then would our prayer
requests stop at man’s wisdom?
Once again, my logic and my theology butt heads. As someone who
has been called to sit with families of the dying and give words of comfort,
this conflict was bound to occur. As the one who watched kids get off the
church van and enter homes that wouldn't be safe for a dog, much less a
child, logic gets you through the night. Some may think that pastors should be
the most spiritual people, but too often calluses form on their hearts more
than others. Yes, theoretically God can heal any ailment, but, more
pragmatically so, He allows things like Alzheimer’s to run their course to
“teach us a lesson” or because it is “just their time.” God can heal families,
but the alcoholic father of that child in the youth group sure seems to be beyond help. In the
ministry, there is wisdom and caution in cutting your losses, growing tunnel
vision, and doing what you can with what you can instead of seeking too many
lost causes. That is sad to hear, I know, but it happens. Pray for your pastor.
It seems there is a belief problem. In the earlier chapter Ask, Just Ask, God revealed to me that
asking for help was not a faith problem. In fact, asking for help and guidance from
the God of Answers is a direct result of faith (a.k.a confidence in the God
that has given reason for confidence). Shamelessness is not a faith issue, but
being audacious is.
Lord, make
me audacious.
*Check back next Monday to hear more from Cory, or hop on over to MinistryMall.org and check out his curriculum!*
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